PURITY 101 – Seven Offense Builders
All of these 101 tips come from chapters in my book 21-Day Purity Jumpstart. It is the foundational book for our ministry.
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A good sexual purity strategy requires a strong defense and a strong offense. The battle for sexual purity is won on the offensive side. Today you will learn the difference between a purity defense and a purity offense and get some practical action points on building your offense.
Defense keeps the bad stuff out (or at least slows it down). It keeps you from being overrun by triggers, temptations and attacks of the Enemy. Defense eliminates obstacles to purity, positions roadblocks, and sets up hurdles. Defense manages the external so that you can focus on the internal.
Offense brings in the good stuff. It pursues healthy people, places and things. It makes forward progress. Offense is actively seeking to heal, grow, build, strengthen, and stretch. Do whatever you can to “beef up” your offense.
Here are seven areas you can work on that will help you build your offense. I have given you a few examples under each one to get you thinking. Take some time under each action point to write out ways you can build your offense.
SEVEN OFFENSE BUILDERS
- Relationships – Start and Strengthen Them – Build your existing relationships with your friends, your support team and your spouse. Do more with the people you know who are helpful, encouraging, supportive, and loving. If you don’t have many friends, you need to take some intentional steps to make new friends. Consider reaching out to church members, small group members, schoolmates, and even family members and neighbors.
- Healing – Find People to Help You – Our hearts need God’s healing. We all have been hurt so badly in our past that it led to damage. Our wounds might be deep anger, disappointment, resentment, negative messages, grief or abuse. Deeper healing helps us grow stronger on the inside. You might find facing the pain with a counselor, minister or someone who has found healing from sexual struggles to be therapeutic.
- Spiritual Life – Feed it – Work on your relationship with God. You need His power to help you. Schedule Bible reading and prayer time with Him. Go places that encourage you to learn more about God. This is where church, small groups, men and women’s ministries and Bible-based conferences can help you in your spiritual growth.
- Serve, Volunteer and Mentor – Look for Opportunities – One of the best ways to get your focus off of yourself is to start helping others. You’re not a purity expert yet, but you can share your story. Your story is powerful and so is your life. Share your life with others. Volunteer through your church or a non-profit organization. When you are giving of yourself and loving, it is impossible to be selfish and consuming. Reversing the flow from selfish to serving will have a huge effect on your sexual health.
- Mind and Heart – Challenge It – Take your mind and heart to places they’ve never been before. Look for a book that will stretch you. Start writing in a journal or on a blog that will stretch your mind. Your heart is challenged as you open it to new people and new experiences. It might mean going on a trip with your kids and doing something special for them. Maybe participating in a marriage conference is something additional that you and your spouse could consider signing up for.
- Faith – Challenge It – What are you doing that requires you to walk by faith? It must be something that is impossible for you in your efforts and resources. What is impossible for us is possible with God. Your faith decision might be a giving decision that stretches you. It might be signing up for a mission trip. It might be sponsoring a child. It might be starting a new job. When we go through life by faith, we are forced to rely on God. Your faith will be challenged many times as you seek to be sexually pure. You have to learn to lean on Him for the strength. What I’m asking you to do is intentionally choose something that will challenge you to depend solely on Him.
- Creativity and Passion – Express It. – You are a passionate, creative person. God made you that way. You have spent a lot of your time, energy, passion, creativity and money on lustful habits. You need to find healthy places for that energy. Take up a hobby. Build something. Create and innovate. Learning to steer yourself in healthy directions when you feel like giving into sinful desires is a huge step. You have to learn to think differently with your creativity.
Can you see how building your offense will help you? When you feel tempted and triggered to sin sexually, you will have a lot of healthy alternatives to pour yourself into. You will learn to find greater fulfillment in relationships, creativity, and work projects than you would with pornography. You will also learn that when your spirit, heart and mind are stretched with new challenges, God will fill you with His strength. Your resistance to sexual sin will grow. Internally you will get stronger. And you will find it easier to be pure and stay pure.